NJBIZ panel examines women’s leadership issues
Listen to this articleNJBIZ hosted a full-day slate of events Nov. 14 aimed at women’s empowerment and leadership, featuring networking as well as notable panel discussions.
Following the 2024 Empowering Women Awards Thursday, NJBIZ held its inaugural Women’s Leadership Summit at The DoubleTree by Hilton Somerset. One of those panel discussions included “Making the Leap,” moderated by NJBIZ Managing Editor Jessica Perry, and featuring:
Following a brief introduction from panelists, the conversation got into full swing as each spoke about leadership. “To get started, and we can go down the line – if you could share, when did you first see yourself as a potential leader? Is there a moment, a project?” Perry asked the group.
“I’ll start – how many of you were that little girl who had a microphone and was a rock star in front of your family? Dance party – whatever it was,” said Costan. “We weren’t afraid of failing.”
Embracing fear
Costan stressed not to let fear stop you – pointing to the famous Wall Street statue of the girl in front of the bull.
“Is she truly fearless or is she just embracing that fear to get to that next level?” she continued. “That’s when I knew what I wanted to do. I want to work with people – that’s all I want. And I don’t want to be their boss. And I don’t want to tell them what to do. I want them to tell me – I want to be part of a team, a great team.”
Sherman spoke next, recounting her own childhood. Born in Belarus, she moved to the United States when she was 19 years old.
“I was on my own. I had to fight – I had to fight to pursue the American dream,” said Sherman. “And to make a life for myself. I didn’t have support here.”
She said that reality helped naturally establish resiliency and a thick skin that would prepare her as she continued to build her career in what is a traditionally male-dominated field.
“I always knew that I wanted to succeed. I wanted to be the best I could be,” she continued. “Going back to resilience – it’s natural when you have the drive. When you want it – to make a difference and help people in your life. That’s what drove me.”
Sherman also stressed and echoed to not be afraid of fear — and not shy away from challenges.
Defining moments
Mills spoke about having her first child at a time when her professional life was busy – and having to rely on her team.
“That was a defining moment for me when I realized that I had come to a point in my career and my life where I really fully needed to embrace and trust the team that we had built,” she explained. “And to know that the success of the team was bigger than one individual outcome. And even if they made the wrong call – we could survive. So that was a big, pivotal point for me, when I fully embraced it. That’s what leadership means to me.”
“I think the one thing to think about is – take what we are saying, but just apply it to modern times,” said Smith, noting the different generations of women in the room and just how much the world has and is changing. “Each one of us has just said something like – we’re going to do it our way because we’ve been through enough. We know enough to go through our fear, to face it with courage – and to move forward.”
‘Money talks’
As part of the first NJBIZ Women’s Leadership Summit, female financial executives from New Jersey-based companies also spoke about the importance of creating and keeping wealth. Read our recap of the day’s first panel.
The conversation continued through the topic of leadership as well as the younger generation and mentorship, before Perry asked about having conversations with people in your personal life about your priorities or even the sacrifices that may have happened during the panelists’ careers to achieve their goals and ambitions.
Costan recounted the decisions that her career has required.
“Yeah, sacrifice happened,” she said, describing having to miss certain events of her kids and more. “And I think this group right here will tell you – we don’t want you to have to go through the same thing. And that’s why there is now work-life balance. That’s why we had to put the expectations in place. We had to make it happen.”
Smith discussed her journey of owning her company and the choices that has required over the years.
“I think that everybody’s story is a little bit different on that side of things,” she said. “But if this is a panel about advice – my sense is that it’s never too late to tell your story and put things out there that allow you to optimally do what you want to do. And you know what, don’t feel badly if you love your job. Don’t feel bad if you love what you do – or if you are passionate about it.”
How you balance that and work that into the rest of your life, Smith continued, is something you have to come to terms with every single day.
“You never know. There could be a life event that happens and makes you rethink things,” said Smith, noting how 9/11 was catalyst for career and life changes for so many in this region and beyond.
Find the ‘why’
As this topic continued, Costan stressed that a main takeaway was to learn from history.
“If you don’t learn from history, you are going to make the same mistakes,” she said. “So, don’t let it happen. Use your voice.”
If you don’t learn from history, you are going to make the same mistakes. So, don’t let it happen. Use your voice.
– Elené Costan, chief human resource officer, Berjé
Mills noted that every woman in the room was making sacrifices to be there at the event – in addition to the sacrifices made on a daily basis just to show up in the world, and on top of other responsibilities.
“So, I like to frame my thinking in terms of – my why,” said Mills. “I started my company to have agency – to choose where my time belongs and who I was going to give it to.”
Sherman said that guilt is not healthy and emphasized being honest with yourself and your loved ones.
“My message is – do not feel guilty. We all make mistakes, and that’s normal,” said Sherman. “Learn from the mistakes and move on. Because that’s the way to earn respect and to earn trust – not just within the business world, but also with your own family.”
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